BIG
TITS ZOMBIE
DVD Region
2. Terracotta Distribution.
Big
Tits Zombie. Just the title is enough to ensure the
attention of any self-respecting Strange Things
reader. Add to that wildly excessive gore, gratuitous nudity,
chainsaws, references to Bataille and, oh yeah, old-school 3D,
and you have a winner!
Based
on the manga Kyonyo Dragon, this Japanese movie
features porn idol Sola Aoi as a stripper who finds herself
down on her luck (waking up next to a horny tramp after a night
drinking) and so agrees to take a gig at a deserted spa resort,
where the dancers outnumber the customers and spend their days
bickering in the dressing room.
However,
when they discover a secret basement filled with occult books,
everything changes. Gothic Lolita Maria (Mari Sakurai) reads
from the Italian(!) Book of the Dead, and before long, various
local corpses have risen and are chomping on the girls. Eventually,
Aoi and fellow porn starlet Risa Kasumi find themselves facing
not only the zombies but also Sakuri, who has become the Queen
of the Dead. Lucky for them, then, that they found a chainsaw
and samurai sword just lying around...
Taking
a few sly digs at films like Chanbara Beauty
(which also has a scantily-clad cowgirl battling zombies), Big
Tits Zombie is unashamedly low-rent. The zombie make-up
is laughable, the action scenes cheesy and the dialogue ripe,
while the (mild) nudity gives new meaning to the word 'gratuitous'.
There are glorious moments of excess, including a fire-breathing
zombie vagina, and at 73 minutes, it doesn't overstay its welcome.
The
3D scenes are dropped in, seemingly at random (a 3D symbol appears
onscreen to let you know when to wear your glasses) - tits and
gore scenes make sense with the third dimension, but a few others
are odd choices. The gimmick mostly appears during the first
half of the film, and the 3D is as effective as any other anaglyph
3D used on a colour movie shown on a TV screen - ie not very.
They do add to the fun though, which I guess is the point of
them.
This
movie isn't on the level of other recent Japanese babes 'n'
blood movies like Machine Girl, Tokyo
Gore Police or Vampire Girl vs Frankenstein
Girl, admittedly. In fact, by most standards, Big
Tits Zombie is rubbish. But it's hugely enjoyable
rubbish and certainly one of the better zombies vs strippers
movies (and there are far more of them than makes sense) out
there. Ideal for watching with a crowd, preferably under the
influence of alcohol.
Hardened
fans of big tits might, however, feel a bit short-changed if
they take the title too literally...
DAVID
FLINT
BUY
IT NOW (UK)
